Our decision to adopt.

We first looked into adoption after my hysterectomy....I became obsessed with the fact that I could not biologically have anymore children and knew I wanted at least one more. I also felt a calling....that perhaps I couldn't change the world but could change the life of one child. We initially decided on Guatemala as the country we would adopt from and started the process about 2 years ago. We had actually finished our home study and then put the adoption on hold. We felt as if we rushed our decision. We knew we still wanted to adopt but not just yet. The boys were 3 and 2 and although I wanted the kids ages to be close together... I felt like I would not be able to handle another child and give all our children the attention they deserved. How could I add another child to our family when I was just staying afloat handling the ones we already had? We were saddened to stop it but knew it was best for everyone. Fast forward 2 years....still thinking of adopting from Guatemala, we traveled to Guatemala City with Cross Cultural Solutions. We toured Antigua and Guatemala City and volunteered at the government orphanage. It was a wonderful experience. Bittersweet... Seeing families in the city fostering their infant children really made me want to start the process again. However, after talking to our director at our homebase,,,who was from Guatemala and after learning of some of the corruption in the adoption process here, my husband did not feel comfortable adopting from Guatemala. I was a little reluctant myself but John said he would not adopt from Guatemala...at least not an infant. After coming home.. we researched different countries and decided on Ethiopia. John was initially full steam ahead but I had some reservation. My biggest fear was that our daughter would be a teenager and look at us and feel different. I feared because of our difference in race... she would feel like she didn't fit in and that she would be angry that we took her from her homeland and people. I have read how so many people think these children should be so grateful to have been adopted but the adoptees don't always feel this way. They didn't ask to be adopted. After long thought and much research I realized this would be a learning process for us all and that through education, honesty, respect and love we would somehow make it work and we would all be better for it. I think we somehow put more pressure on ourselves to be sure everything turns out perfect for our adopted children. Enter All God's Children International Adoption.